Cars and Rap: A Tale of True Love

"meatatarian" (ncnorm3) 04/23/2014 at 13:00 • Filed to: Music, Rap, Cars in music, porsche, ferrari, bugatti, 2CHAINZ, TRU

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Now, if you're anything like me (and I have no doubt you are), you base many of your most important life decisions largely upon the opinions of others. Automotive purchases, perhaps life's most important decisions, are no exception. We all find figures to look up to, and who better to idolize and take important life advice from than the poets and philosophers of our age: Rappers. In terms of purchasing advice, they make Consumer Reports look like The National Enquirer . In recent years, I've taken to bettering myself by listening exclusively to rap music. Those that know me well will understand that this is why my wardrobe consists almost entirely of items from Gucci and Prada, and my bedsheets, flatware, and plates are all made by Versace.

I, for instance, based my most recent car purchase largely on the basis of the lyrical stylings of our generation's Walt Whitman: Mr. Tausheed Epps, better known as 2 Chainz (formerly the eponymous 'Tityboi'). In his 2012 Tour de Force "I Luv dem Strippers ," Mr. Chainz bequeathed upon our ears this gem: "In my foreign car/with the trunk by the engine/ so when I back back, I'm frontin' on you n*****"

It's just like he said! The engine is in the goddamn trunk!

Having heard that, I immediately began to frantically search for a vehicle that met these impressive criteria. It had to be foreign, and have the trunk in or around the engine. Ferrari and the like being well outside of my price range, I had to have a Porsche, Lotus, or MR2.

The last vehicle I owned, an M3, was purchased largely as result of listening to a modern-day Shakespeare who should need no introduction: Mr. Christopher George Latore Wallace, a genius who was both B.I.G. and small, and above all, notorious. I was so hypnotized by his words, that I didn't even realize that his mention of an M3 involved him shooting at it. No matter, I had to have one.

Everywhere we look, it becomes clear that the main reason we buy the cars we do is that we are lucky enough to have these visionaries, these artists, to prescribe our automotive tastes for us. There is no doubt, for example, that our very own Doug DeMuro chose his Ferrari 360 over a Lexus due to the excellent " I Need a Doctor," by Dr. Dre. A song that, by the way, seems a little ridiculous at face- If you yourself are a doctor, why do you need another one? Unless he never actually went to medical school, which seems a little farfetched, even for art. Let's just hope Doug's Ferrari doesn't meet the same fate. Actually, another point of contention: Wouldn't the Ferrari explode or at least turn into a Maranello flambee after crashing?

And no, it's not all exotics, bling SUVs, and other expensive cars that rappers have created a market for: Let's examine the popularity of one of Jalopnik's well-documented favorites, the Mercedes W123. What's that you say? Surely this is a vehicle that owes its popularity to its remarkable build quality, longevity, and classic styling? Think again, because here it is, a central feature in Donald Glover, AKA Childish Gambino's, "Heartbeat." This just goes to show that even when we least suspect it, we have the subtle guiding hand of rap music to thank for our tastes in cars.

I'll end this musing with one of the greatest automotive-themed songs ever written, about what is unquestionably one of the greatest cars ever produced. Once again, I think that no one will question that the Bugatti Veyron owes most of its success and acclaim to a rap song. The celebrated wordsmith Ace Hood's "Bugatti" catapulted the VW Group's halo car to the status it now enjoys; without his magnum opus it is easy to imagine a world where the Bugatti rebirth is merely a footnote in automotive history. Thanks to Mr. Hood, the 1,000+HP hypercar has truly achieved the status it so richly deserved. So turn up the bass, sit back, and listen to automotive history.

Party-vi > meatatarian 04/23/2014 at 13:03

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This made me giggle.

Frosted > meatatarian 04/23/2014 at 13:03

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I would never buy a car because someone mentioned it in a song. Just sayin'.

stuttgartobsessed > meatatarian 04/23/2014 at 13:04

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It's not just America... Ze Germans like to rap about their domestic whips:

thebigbossyboss > stuttgartobsessed 04/23/2014 at 13:08

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So do Nigerian's even though they don't have domestic cars.

For Sweden > meatatarian 04/23/2014 at 13:09

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No mention of "German Whip"?

KnowsAboutCars > stuttgartobsessed 04/23/2014 at 13:09

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You mean Norwegians?

And yep, pretty much global phenomenon.

stuttgartobsessed > KnowsAboutCars 04/23/2014 at 13:15

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Are they Norwegian? I don't know. Anyway, I just though of another great car related video I'm gonna share with y'all:

meatatarian > stuttgartobsessed 04/23/2014 at 14:51

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This is a good one, you could write a whole book on this topic haha

deekster_caddy > meatatarian 04/23/2014 at 14:57

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Can't find the 'real' video... but Public Enemy!!!

Janson Rodger > meatatarian 04/23/2014 at 15:08

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Rick Ross mentions his Rolls-Royce Wraith a lot in his new album. And now I'm probably going to have to listen to it all over again so I can count.

BUT, on the reverse side of that, way back in the year 2000 Method Man had this line on Gravel Pit from The W: "Can't stand Bentleys they cost too much." Clearly Meth is one of the few that doesn't like to flaunt his wealth.

meatatarian > For Sweden 04/23/2014 at 15:16

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oh true, this would have been a great addition. Really just too many to choose from!

Milky > meatatarian 04/29/2014 at 23:13

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Thanks for Childish some love, I love his Fisker line in his new(ish) song.

TheD0k_2many toys 2little time > meatatarian 04/29/2014 at 23:41

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Nothing about the prettiest automaker?

meatatarian > Milky 04/29/2014 at 23:56

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Hey uh, just so you know, Fiskers don't make noise. Childish is great, had to mix some good stuff in with the shit hahaha

Someone Else's Projects > meatatarian 04/30/2014 at 00:08

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Annoyingly you can't see much of it, but Mobb Deep's ride in this video is a Saab 9000.

doctorhoon > meatatarian 04/30/2014 at 01:42

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The true jalop rappers are Chuck Inglish and Mikey Rocks (aka The Cool Kids). They rap about GMC Typhoons, '96 SLs, Mazda Miatas and good old American land yachts.

tkeela > meatatarian 04/30/2014 at 02:06

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Why only songs in English? Here, have some Germans singing about German cars.

SukhoiRomantic > meatatarian 04/30/2014 at 04:33

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Disagree. Having heard the fellow sing my feelings are he should have listened to John Candy and become an airconditioning repairman

Satoshi "Zipang" Katsura > meatatarian 04/30/2014 at 06:18

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For those who can't stand listening to what any sane person calls "garbage."

Sadly, the composer who made this song (in collaboration with Five Deez) was killed at the Shuto Expressway in 2010. The methaphorical music segment is already worse off without him.

BJ > meatatarian 04/30/2014 at 07:41

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In the video for Ride With Me by Nelly, there's a thunder chicken with t-tops, leopard print seat covers and a tiger print steering wheel cover. Don't remember if it's mentioned on the lyrics or not...

Clint Alexander > meatatarian 04/30/2014 at 09:30

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Don't forget, Gucci is always rapping about cars. He's usually on Lamborghinis though, not Ferraris.

VW Fan Boy > meatatarian 04/30/2014 at 09:36

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Honorable Mention?

RedRam47 > meatatarian 04/30/2014 at 10:41

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you forgot to mention Jay-Z show me what you got.

gabest > meatatarian 04/30/2014 at 11:20

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As a nearly life long rap music fan, this article sucks. Figures that you have 2chains and Childish Gambino as examples. Go to any early 2000's and mid 90s rap. You exclude The Chronic, which is basically a car album. You don't mention T.I. or Rick Ross, two rappers who bleed cars. Look at their collection of cars and this will tell you.

I understand that this was probably written tongue in cheek, but it is poorly written given the true history of cars in rap music, if you dig just a little bit below the pseudo rap that is out now.

/rant

gromy21 > For Sweden 04/30/2014 at 13:29

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wow, the song and video are total garbage. Blacked out windows and he is on a car with no tints. LMAO

For Sweden > gromy21 04/30/2014 at 13:34

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thatsthejoke.sldprt

DIYautoFTW > Janson Rodger 04/30/2014 at 13:42

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They were rollin in MPVs every week, which apparently got them $40g's

DIYautoFTW > DIYautoFTW 04/30/2014 at 13:43

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I was a little disappointed the article was all music from the past couple years dre excluded.